How to Adapt Lessons to Fit Your Student’s Interests and Make Learning Come Alive

A GFHS reader wrote to me, concerned about her student’s lack of interest in doing homeschool lessons, although he showed a wide capacity for learning and retaining facts about sports. The mom was frustrated as to how to get any actual lessons accomplished, since their days were an endless series of disagreements and strife. This is when out-of-the-box thinking can really pay off. Taking the lessons out of the box and away from the textbooks can make a huge difference and ignite the spark of learning in a “reluctant” learner such as this student. The examples given here will relate to football (this particular child’s passion), but you can easily adapt these ideas to wherever your students’ interests lie.

When a child is keenly interested in football or other sports, that can be used as an “in” for other subjects. For instance, put a map of the USA on a bulletin board and have him stick a pin in the approximate places where his favorite NFL players were born. Then have him place another pin in the city where each player went to college and connect the two pins for each player with a piece of yarn. Suddenly he’ll be up to his elbows in a fascinating research project and geography lesson that doesn’t feel like schoolwork to him at all!

Take this in a slightly different direction by challenging him to do some research on the NFL teams, making a chart showing when each team was founded, where it began, and if or where it has moved. Have some of the teams’ names or colors or mascots changed throughout the years? Now he’s found a history lesson that he can really enjoy! Give him more pins for the map (and a different color of yarn) to show the movements of the teams. A little more research can reveal what important world events coincided with significant team events or crucial games for more history, this time linking football to other events. Find inventions or products that were introduced during the years that match up to his favorite events regarding games, teams, or players, and that can bring in some science lessons. Look at how football uniforms, pads, helmets, and other equipment have changed over the years and why for some more science and history.

Challenge him to research the backgrounds of a few favorite players and write “color commentary” that could be used by a sportscaster, and you’ll have a writing assignment he’ll be eager to do! Challenge him to write his own sports “column” or read and critique the sports columns or blogs by professional sports writers, and he’ll have reading material, comprehension studies, and analytical writing assignments that hold his interest. To round out the language arts lessons, focus on his content first, then work on helping him correct spelling, punctuation, and grammar — always examining the rules for each change, not just criticizing his writing without reasons. He may even learn to spot spelling and grammar errors in the professionals’ columns for an important lesson in why accuracy matters!

Players’ statistics can be analyzed for some practical, real-life applications in math. Calculate the total yards of passing or rushing, the percentage of completed passes, or how a player’s averages have improved or declined over his career. Math practice is math practice, regardless of whether it uses random problems on a worksheet or real-life statistics. When the real-life applications mean something to the student, he will have motivation to complete the work. Learning one fact will spur curiosity to learn more facts, and before long, the student will be knee-deep in new information and hungry for more.

The homeschooling mom mentioned earlier took this advice and began adapting lessons to her son’s interest in football. When his curriculum focused on poetry, they searched the internet for poems about football—and were delighted with their results. One poem prompted a discussion, which led to further studies and more topics. This simple substitution transformed a struggle over a single, uninteresting lesson into a day filled with curiosity, researching, exploring, and learning.

Lessons that are based on real-life interests will combine several academic subjects all at once, rather than following the institutional school model of working on each individual subject for forty minutes before switching to the next unrelated subject for the next forty-minute period. Your student can research a given topic, study and analyze the reading material, pursue more research as to the geography, science, or history related to the topic, perform some math calculations to gain better understanding of the data, create a timeline of events, and express his conclusions and personal opinions in a variety of formats. The analysis of the information is conveyed, whether it takes on the form of a formal essay, a news story, editorial column, a poem, song, or rap, or even a personal journal entry. My own student who was reluctant to read assigned stories outside his field of interest became a voracious reader when the subject matter fed his curiosity. (How many adults would waste valuable time reading things in which they have no interest?) Adapting lessons to your students’ interests teaches those students how to learn from every facet of life and sets them firmly on the path to life-long learning.

See also:
The Value of Supplemental Activities
10 Ways to Improve a Lesson
How Can I Teach Out-of-the-Box Thinking?
Is Learning Limited to Books?
Every Day Is a Learning Day, and Life Is Our Classroom

Why Does Math Class Take SO LONG?

Homeschooling families often have this lament: My child takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r to do math each day! Can anything be done??? Let’s consider for a moment exactly what the student is being asked to do, to see if we can understand why it takes so much time. (Please note: I will use he/him/his as generic pronouns; all of this applies equally to girls and boys.)

Beginning students are learning the fine art of manipulating numbers to learn the processes of adding, subtracting, multiplying, dividing, and learning new number-languages called fractions, decimals, percentages, measurements, and on and on. You, the parent/teacher, are probably performing calculations with a minimum of fifteen to twenty years’ experience, quite likely much more. What seems incredibly plain and simple to you may in reality be incredibly confusing to your student.

Nearly every math lesson will present the student with a new concept, or at least an expansion of a previously learned concept. This means that the student must 1) study the new idea to grasp its meaning, 2) compare this new information to his previous knowledge to see how they relate to each other, 3) experiment with a few sample problems to test out the new concept and prove his understanding of it, 4) proceed to complete the remainder of the lesson’s required problem set, which may include both problems from today’s new concept and problems from previously learned lessons as review material. Steps 1-3 can be prolonged and repeated through discussions with the teacher (you) to insure that the student understands the new material fully. Examples may be drawn on paper, chalkboard, or whiteboard. Manipulatives may be used for grouping and regrouping. Graphs, charts, geometric figures, angles, and other mathematical illustrations may be incorporated. Teaching a math lesson in a way that your student will understand it completely can take time. Once the lesson has been understood, the student must mentally review the concepts again with each problem to make sure he understands the process as he is working his way through all of the day’s assigned problems.

In contrast, a grammar lesson may ask the student to write a sentence using an action verb, and the student looking for shortcuts may respond with “Jim sat.” It has a subject and a verb, it shows action, and it meets all the requirements. However, math requires exactness. There are few, if any, shortcuts to be taken in math. Mathematical calculations have concrete solutions: one and only one answer. Every operation must be exact, every digit must be accurate, and every calculation must be done completely, in order for the outcome to be correct.
4321
+765
___6Wrong. Shortcuts do not work in math.

Some may argue that calculators provide shortcuts, but I will counter that calculators should not be used until higher math, and then only as a time-saving device by the student who is fully capable of doing the work accurately without the aid of a calculator. In the words of my favorite college math teacher, “[Calculators] are stupid. They are machines that can only do exactly what you tell them to do.” The student who accidentally pushes the wrong button will get the wrong answer. I know. I did it. On a final exam. My paper showed that I had executed the problem correctly, but in my haste to complete the problem quickly, I hit the wrong button on a very, very, very simple calculation and achieved the wrong final answer. My gracious teacher gave me partial credit for using the correct process, but his point was made forever that using a calculator does not automatically provide success. Every keystroke must be verified by an alert mind. My haste ruined what would have been a perfect score on my final — disappointing, to say the least.

Back when I was plugging my way through elementary math, I had a teacher who required perfection, not merely correctness. She was a bitter old shrew of a woman who had been encouraged to stay in a classroom long past her prime and had lost all compassion for the children placed under her authoritative control; but I digress. A math problem can be solved correctly without perfectly formed digits or immaculately aligned numbers, and the existence of erasure marks on the paper has little to do with the accuracy (or inaccuracy) of the answers. When my children began doing math problems that included multiple columns of numbers, I bought them spiral notebooks of graph paper to use for their daily assignments. They could write one digit in each quarter-inch box, and the boxes kept the digits perfectly aligned. My students could focus on the place values as they copied the numbers for the problems, and then successfully solve the equation without being sidetracked by wondering if a wayward digit rightfully belonged in the tens’ column or the hundreds’ column.

Math is a sequential subject: each lesson builds upon each lesson before it. If foundational skills have been rushed and are not fully understood, each subsequent lesson will become harder and harder to grasp. Do not push your youngsters to make progress in math simply for the sake of turning pages. Be certain that each student knows what he is doing before allowing him to move on to the next concept. However, many enjoyable games and activities can be used to reinforce math concepts and provide practice with fun — and using math means learning math, even if you are playing a game and having fun.

Let’s focus for a moment on your particular student. Does his learning style allow him to absorb new information easily when he reads it the first time? Or does your student benefit from an oral discussion with you and some Q & A about the subject matter? Perhaps your student is more hands-on and doesn’t really get the concept until he can play with some math manipulatives, moving them around, grouping and regrouping, sorting and re-sorting, counting and recounting? (That’s why they’re called “manipulatives,” by the way, because you can manipulate them.) And let’s not forget that kinesthetic student whose brain goes numb when his seat makes contact with the chair’s seat — he may need to be on his feet, stretching his muscles through every minute of his math lesson, but that physical action guarantees that his brain is revved up and tuned in — not at all what classroom models need you to believe. A student whose learning style is not being utilized will be a student who is easily distracted from the subject at hand. Touch his learning style and you will gain his attention.

One last consideration is the amount of work set forth in your student’s textbook. All textbooks are not created equal, and especially not math texts. The number of problems required with each day’s lesson may change from day to day in certain books, and it will surely change from year to year, but it especially changes from publisher to publisher. When my high school student was using a math textbook that assigned 30 problems per day, her friends’ math textbook from a different publisher assigned 100 problems per day for the same grade level. I repeat: All textbooks are not created equal, and especially not math texts. Our book’s daily 30-problem set offered a variety of problems, using a method of continual review over past concepts. The 100-problems-per-day book offered no such variety: all 100 problems were of the exact same type. Is it any wonder that students can become bored and tired of doing math?

Math does take time. Math will probably be the subject that eats up the largest segment of your homeschool day. However, if your student is sitting idly, hour after hour, staring at a math lesson but not completing it, there are most likely several causes at work.

1) A lack of foundational arithmetic skills. A child who cannot recognize specific digits for their representative amounts cannot perform addition. A child who does not know addition facts cannot perform subtraction or progress on to multiplication. A child who does not know multiplication facts cannot perform division. A child who does not know multiplication facts will not fully understand fractions and, therefore, will also not understand decimals, percentages, or measurements.

2) The student has not understood the lesson concepts or is confused by them. This is often due to the student’s learning style. This is not a disability, just a difference in how each of us takes in and processes information. Some people take in information through their eyes, some through their ears, others through their fingers, and still others through their larger muscles of arms and legs. Seriously. Touch his learning style and you will grab his attention.

3) The textbook may be too aggressive (moving too quickly for the student’s pace) or just plain too boring in how it presents the material. While much of math is often taught through drill, drill, drill, I do not know anyone who would choose to learn anything through repetitive and boring drills if there was a more interesting alternative available.

Allow enough teaching time and a variety of teaching methods to be sure your student understands each lesson concept completely. Allow your student to talk things out, work with manipulatives, or run a lap after every problem to keep his muscles-to-brains connection engaged. Allow your restless student to take breaks while working his math problems, knowing that you, too, would break up a long and tedious task into shorter segments, if it did not hold your rapt attention. Math does take time, but the flexibility of Guilt-Free Homeschooling allows you to conquer it with the methods that work best for your family.

For more tips, see also —

Looking for the “Hard Part”

10 Fun Math Exercises from a BINGO Game

Sugar Cube Math

Alternate Methods for Teaching Math

Topical Index: Math

Topical Index: Learning Styles

10 Ways to Improve a Lesson

Sometimes we all need help teaching a lesson. The lesson may be too confusing, too short, or just plain boring. Your student may need a more complete explanation or just want to delve more deeply into the subject. You may need to expand the lesson to include an activity to fit your student’s learning style. No matter what the reason, here are a few suggestions for how to improve a lesson.

  1. Make it bigger. — Suppose your child is learning fractions, and the book’s diagrams are rather small. Draw similar diagrams using an entire sheet of paper for each one — sometimes bigger IS better! Simple drawings and diagrams do not demand precision: children are good at pretending, and they can pretend along with you that your drawing is accurate.
  2. Take it outside. — Fresh air and elbow room can improve anyone’s ability to think. Even reading a favorite storybook outdoors can give it new perspective.
  3. Add color. — Say good-bye to black-and-white; say hello to understanding. Use colored pencils or markers, highlighters, construction paper, or colored index cards. For example, write each step of a complicated math problem in a different color to help clarify the progression.
  4. Add texture. — Go beyond flat and give your fingertips a chance to enjoy themselves. Form ABC’s with Play-Doh, cut letters out of sandpaper, or draw with chalk on the sidewalk.
  5. Let your student play with it. — Exploration is the birthplace of genius. Go beyond the lesson plan and indulge your student with his own session of free experimentation, whether with math manipulatives, Scrabble letter tiles, vinegar and baking soda, etc. Playing is learning.
  6. Add more details. — Why strain to understand a single example, when ten examples will make it crystal clear? Suppose your child is trying to learn the letter A; show the child many examples of what A looks like, from several ABC books, from newspaper headlines, on packages in your pantry; draw A with crayons and markers, in shaving cream smeared on a window, in dry cornmeal poured in a baking pan; arrange small items into an A shape: pennies, pipe cleaners, pencils, building blocks, toy cars, fingers, etc. — after all of these examples, your child will better understand how to recognize an A!
  7. Discuss it. — Skip the one-sided lecture and the interrogation-style Q & A session; try an open and honest give-and-take, valuing your student’s opinions, reactions, and ideas. How would you react if those opinions were coming from your friend, instead of from your child?
  8. Build it. — Cardboard, scissors, and tape are the stuff that feeds imagination. Projects don’t have to be constructed well enough to last forever, just long enough to illustrate the concept.
  9. Research it (together). — Expand two great minds at the same time. The teacher doesn’t always have to know the answers before the student does — your student will develop new respect for you as he sees you willing to learn with him.
  10. Make it personal. — Use a personal application to your student’s own life, activities, or possessions, and he’ll never forget it. Instead of math manipulatives, use the student’s building blocks, toy cars, baseball cards, Barbie doll shoes, etc.

The specific examples given above might be either too simple or too advanced for your current needs, but you can adapt them to your student’s situation. Even if you think some of these ideas may not help with your particular struggles, dare to give them a try anyway. You may be pleasantly surprised at the results!

21 Things That Can Slow Homeschooling Progress

Typically, homeschoolers talk about the blessings and benefits of homeschooling, which are myriad. However, sometimes Life throws us a curveball — and once in a while, several curveballs — too many to deal with casually as part of the normal course of events. If you have found yourself the unwitting recipient of these circumstances, you may be worrying that your family is just not progressing with homeschooling as quickly as you should or even as well as you used to do. If you feel you are on the verge of a homeschool breakdown, the cause may not necessarily be something you are doing wrong — it may just be due to too many complex situations occurring at the same time or in rapid succession. The following list of unique situations may contain some of the things your family has experienced that you previously had not considered as being directly related to your rate of academic progress (or lack of progress).

1. Homeschooling for the first time
2. Leaving public or private school to switch to homeschooling
3. A reluctant learner who balks at the idea of schoolwork in general
4. An eager learner who wants to explore extensively into each topic
5. Pregnancy
6. Childbirth
7. Adoption
8. An infant
9. A toddler
10. A special needs child
11. A chronic illness or other health crisis affecting any family member
12. A severe injury requiring extended recovery or rehabilitation for any family member
13. An elderly parent/grandparent who needs care or must be moved to a care facility
14. Extensive property damage from fire, flood, or natural disaster
15. A legal or financial crisis
16. A job change
17. Moving to a different home
18. A wedding
19. A divorce
20. A death in the family
21. Miscarriage or stillbirth

Please note that this list is not complete. You may be experiencing some things that are not listed here and yet have been just as devastating to your “normal” routine. If your family has experienced more than one of these items in the past year or in consecutive years, please consult the article Top 10 Benefits of Homeschooling with Grace and Topical Index: Doing Your “Best” and Topical Index: Encouragement for Parents for some much-needed comfort and uplifting encouragement. If you have reason to anticipate any of these events in your foreseeable future, try to plan ahead as much as is humanly possible in order to prepare yourselves for the upcoming event and its schedule-altering effects. Please note that some of these factors cannot be predicted at all, some will last only a few months, but others may continue for years or for a lifetime (such as a special needs child).

Above all else, know that when your family encounters the types of situations listed above, your children will have experienced Life up-close and personally, and that in itself is an education that no textbook can provide!

How Can I Teach Out-of-the-Box Thinking?

[This article was written by Jennifer (Morrison) Leonhard: Guilt-Free daughter and homeschool graduate.]

Society spends years conforming our minds, teaching us to follow certain conventions and rules, and then once we reach college and business, we are asked to be “out of the box thinkers.” I turned to my brother for inspiration at this point. My brother has never been accused of being “in the box” unless it was a large cardboard box, wrapped as a Christmas present during a white elephant gift exchange. (Yes, he really did that.)

In math class, when presented with a hexagon and asked to “Name this figure,” he simply wrote “Bob.” When Mom asked what direction he would be facing if he went out the front door, walked 3 steps and turned right, took 3 steps, then turned right again, took 3 steps and turned right again, he said, “Forward!” By nature I am more of a conformist, striving to give the answer that was expected of me, and when faced with an “out of the box” question, I was often lost. Given no absolute and no example upon which to base my answers, I didn’t know where to look and often called my brother from college to see what his answer would be. After an hour or so of brainstorming, I could find a direction that suited me for forming my own thoughts.

Surprisingly though, I have often been considered by my peers as a bit out of the box. For the past few years, I have dressed in costume for work during the holiday season. It started when I worked in a commission environment (selling fine jewelry) and had to find a way to gain attention and get customers to talk to me. Dressing in a Santa hat and curly toed shoes with bells on the ends made customers want to greet me, instead of shying away when I greeted them. Getting the initial greeting with the customer was the hard part — after that I could gain the information I needed to learn who they were shopping for and what that person might like in a gift. My costumes prompted the customers to speak to me first.

Last year we had too much Halloween inventory at our retail store, and it wasn’t moving out the door fast enough. I started dressing in costumes, and children would beg their parents for a costume: after all, that girl over there (me) is dressed up, and it isn’t Halloween yet! It worked. I started coming up with as many costumes as I could, digging through our old dress-up box to come up with ideas. Many costumes were based on a single hat and accessorized to fit the theme. A witch’s hat turned an ordinary black dress, green tights, and green eye shadow into a complete character. The same idea worked with an inexpensive pirate’s hat and a striped shirt, dark eyeliner, one hoop earring, and a gold blazer. Everyone at work asked where I got these elaborate costumes, but most of them were things I normally wore to work any other day, but they were just combined differently to go with a specific hat. It seems simple enough when explained, but my coworkers simply can’t get over each costume I wear. They laugh at my courage to wear a costume to work, since many are not planning to wear a costume on Halloween, but I’ve been wearing costumes every day for weeks.

I don’t know exactly what factors made my brother and me the way we are, but I do know that we were encouraged to have an imagination much bigger than ourselves. We drew Dr. Seuss characters with chalk on the sidewalk and tried to create Seuss-like characters of our own. Mom had wanted to be an astronaut when she grew up, and that same desire to shoot for the moon was passed on to my brother and me.

When my brother and I were growing up, Mom would ask us questions that would get us to think situations through. Along with asking us simpler questions, like what sounds certain animals made, she would ask us more intriguing questions, such as how would we get our shoes tied if we had a broken arm. She asked questions that would get us to anticipate the future before it happened, and consider how different variables could alter the outcome. We were encouraged to look at questions from different angles, to experiment to see what happened, and to have the imagination to believe anything was possible.

Mom created new games using parts from the other games we had — usually to teach us something. I hated spelling, but using Scrabble tiles to form my spelling words made the subject a little easier to grasp. Math was more fun when it involved a scavenger hunt for us and a friend. In fact, Mom always called math a puzzle. She enjoyed algebra, and as annoying as that was sometimes, she taught us how to see it as a puzzle, too. Mom used her math skills to scale down the solar system to the size of our block — the sun was as wide as our street, and we drew its outline with chalk right there in the middle of the street, and then we mapped out the planets to scale, too. Seeing how far the planets would be from each other if the sun would fit on our street helped us to imagine how far away from each other they must be in real life.

I’m not especially talented, I am a horrible artist, the musical talent went to my brother, and I wouldn’t make a good actress. I’m also not the homeschooler who is likely to be featured on the cover of a magazine. I enjoy math, but it doesn’t come easily to me. However, I did learn to visualize things, whether possible or not, in order to come up with solutions and decide on the best one. Although a lot of my homeschooling came from books due to my love of reading, some of the most memorable parts were when our family got out of the textbooks, out of the classroom, and out of the box.

From the Mailbox: Troublesome Students

This is part of a series of articles based on actual questions I have received and my replies to them. Real names will not be used, and I will address my responses to a generic “Mom”; if you are a homeschooling Dad, the advice can usually be applied to you as well. The wording will be altered from the original letters (and often assembled from multiple letters) and personal details will be omitted or disguised in order to protect the privacy of the writers while still maintaining the spirit of the question. If you have a specific homeschooling question that you would like me to address, please write to me at guiltfreehomeschooling@gmail.com. If part of your letter is used in an article, your identity will be concealed.

Dear Carolyn,
I have tried to homeschool both of my children at the same time, but I cannot make it work. They pick on each other, fight with each other, act up, act stupid, act silly, and do everything they possibly can think of to prevent any teaching, learning, or schoolwork from taking place. It is driving me crazy. I can send one or both of them to a Christian school, but my desire is to be able to teach them myself at home. Why can’t I handle this? They are my kids, and I love them dearly, but I can’t get the two of them to cooperate with me at the same time. What am I doing wrong???
–Mom

Dear Mom,
Please consider that my reply is accompanied by a great big hug. I do understand what you are going through, although much of my own similar experiences had been forgotten until your letter dredged up the memories of siblings kicking each other under the table and making faces at each other, disrupting each other’s concentration. I will offer multiple suggestions here, but you can decide what order of trying things works best for your situation.

Set your boundaries for acceptable behavior during class times, and make sure that your children understand what the limitations are. Establish exactly what the consequences will be for crossing those boundaries (I restricted privileges; it worked well for my son), then enforce your rules and reward good behavior. The rewards part is the most important, because no one wants to live in a world of only punishment. Remember, though, that this is homeschooling (not school-at-home), and try not to be overly strict on permissible behavior — relax and enjoy each other. When I made time for a little fun, we enjoyed our days so much more than if I had kept things strict and tedious.

Seating arrangements: My children (at first) sat opposite each other at a table approximately 3’x4′ with benches on the two long sides. Your letter quickly brought back the memories of how they would swing their legs (often without thinking about their actions) and end up kicking each other. I had to enforce a rule of “keep your feet under your own space” — and allow them stretch breaks to get away from our school table and exercise their muscles. Your letter also suddenly reminded me of setting up a visual barrier for a time: I propped up something tall in the middle of the table to prevent them from distracting each other with stares and goofy looks.

Broken Rules: When one of my kiddies did upset the other by breaking the no-kicking rule, I kept the rule breaker at the table with me, and allowed the “good” child to go elsewhere to work on his/her lesson. That way, they did not learn that breaking a rule earned them free time or a privilege or break — it backfired and earned the victim a privilege. However, beware of the sneaky child who can irritate a sibling just enough to force retaliation, making the instigator look like the innocent victim — it happens!

Spread out: Sometimes we moved to a larger space where I could sit between my two children with them both facing the same direction. No more foot contact or eye contact was possible, except through me.

Rewards: I praised them and gave rewards for good behavior, not just punishment for bad behavior. A behavior chart can be beneficial (especially for boys) to track how long each student can go without breaking the rules: how many lesson periods, or minutes, hours, or days. Again, give rewards — perhaps offer home-made coupons or tickets for each successful time period of good behavior and allow the tickets to be traded in for a special treat. Your goal is to establish a pattern of good behavior and turn that pattern into a habit.

Maturity comes with age: Discuss your expectations with your children, one on one, and explain how you expect their behavior to improve as they grow older. Do not underestimate how much your students are growing and maturing by expecting their previous (undesirable) behavior to continue. No one wants to be stereotyped for his entire life, so watch closely for every little sign of improvement in their behavior and praise, praise, praise.

Get the wiggles out: Your most important tool in changing your students’ behavior will be physical exercise. Boys, especially, have a difficult time sitting still for lessons — there are just too many fascinating things in this universe to be explored and investigated. I sent my son out into the backyard to burn off a little steam before trying to sit him down for schoolwork. I gave him frequent breaks to run, jump, and play. A friend had shared with me about sending her children outside to run laps around the house until they were so tired they could not do anything BUT sit still and listen to Mom. It works wonderfully! With a few repetitions of that preparation technique, your students will gladly sit down and behave themselves. Kinesthetic learners need to get their large muscles moving first, just to kick their brain cells into gear, as if their minds cannot process information until their hips and shoulders have been warmed up.

Physical Separation: As your children show ability and responsibility, you can separate them for lessons. If your home situation allows, place one child in the kitchen and the other in the living room, then you shuffle back and forth, giving assignments and checking on their progress. I do not expect you to do this forever — you are trying to teach each child how to work independently. When each one has understood how to do his OWN lessons, then you can begin to bring them back together for short periods and see their behavior improve.

Since your older child will probably spend more time at his lessons each day than the younger one needs to spend, try to stage the schoolwork so that the younger child can entertain himself during the periods when the older one needs your help. Allow the older child to do reading subjects or seatwork in his bedroom (away from his sibling), as he proves himself responsible at independent work, allowing you one-on-one time with the younger student. (Families with more than two students can expand these ideas as needed to suit their circumstances.)

Controlled Togetherness: Try reading aloud to them for together time — some fascinating, mind-stimulating books about mysteries or investigations. Seat them far enough apart to prevent physical contact, and let them use art materials or play with Lego’s quietly while you read to them. I strongly recommend that each child have his own activity during the read-aloud time, not letting them have a chance to quarrel over possession of the Lego’s or crayons. Again, you are trying to teach them how to behave when sharing the same space, so start with them apart and slowly bring them closer together while observing your boundaries of acceptable behavior.

You can do this, Mom. The first year of homeschooling is definitely the hardest, and if this is your first year of schooling both children at home, do not assume it will always be like this. Do not beat yourself up for past failures — learn from them. I was afraid to try homeschooling until my younger child was in 1st grade, simply because he was such an extremist toddler/preschooler that I thought he would consume all of my time and energy. Once he was old enough to sit down and do lessons, things went much better. Make your schedule work in your favor, separate your children when you must, and teach them how to co-exist by using controlled situations. Remember, Mom, our children may have more energy than we do, but we have the advantage of more experience!

For further tips on bringing peace to your homeschool, see the following articles:
Is This “Acceptable Behavior”?
“Parent” Is a Verb
Family Is Spelled T-E-A-M
Siblings As Best Friends
From the Mailbox: Disrespectful kids
Kids Will Be Kids
Spoken Destinies & Learned Behaviors
Teach Your Students to Teach Themselves
Teach Your Children the Art of Amusing Themselves
Your Children Will Not Always Be Like This
Homeschooling Failures I Have Known — and What Can Be Learned From Them
From the Mailbox: Read-Aloud Disruptions

Tactile Lessons from Helen Keller and Anne Sullivan

In studying learning styles, I became intrigued by the example of Helen Keller. Born as a normal baby, young Helen lost her sight and hearing during a serious illness at the tender age of 19 months. Trapped in a now dark and silent world, Helen struggled to communicate her desires with her family, and they struggled just as much to communicate with her. By age 6, Helen was a wild child, practically undisciplined, and inevitably self-focused. Her desperate parents, grasping at every straw of hope as any of us would, made a series of contacts which finally brought Anne Sullivan to their home as a teacher for Helen. Anne had lost her own sight for a period of several years, but also had learned to communicate with another deaf and blind woman through the manual alphabet. Those who have seen the movie version of this story, The Miracle Worker, know basically how the rest of the story progresses. My interest led me a step further, to Helen’s biography, The Story of My Life, recently restored to its original 1903 content.

The recently released volume includes Helen’s story from several points of view: Helen’s own accounts, Anne Sullivan’s notes and letters, and further reports and insights from John Macy (Anne’s husband and partner in working with the adult Helen) and other close acquaintances. The result is a comprehensive look at communicating with and educating a student who does not respond well to visual or auditory stimuli. The methods used by Miss Sullivan confirmed my hypotheses: 1) some children do not respond adequately to simply seeing or hearing lesson material but can become enthusiastic about learning through other methods; 2) certain children may need constant tactile stimuli to “break through” into their worlds of thought; 3) as educators, we should set our expectations high enough that our students have a goal to reach for; and 4) language should not be “dumbed down” for children.

Teaching the Tactile Child

1. There is a world that can be discovered beyond the average student’s visual or auditory capabilities. Visually motivated students are a teacher’s dream: put the information in front of them, and they will learn. Auditory learners pick up information simply by hearing it — with certain things once is enough, but at other times, hearing something over and over will lock the information in their minds without their ever having seen the material in printed form.

Other students have tactile needs. They may find looking at a picture book mildly interesting, and listening to a story will barely hold their attention, but pop-up storybooks with interactive mechanisms and touch-and-feel books with textured surfaces will draw the tactile learner in a much deeper way. I was never as interested in the plot of my storybook about a misbehaving kitty as much as I loved that book for its large fuzzy pictures of the beautiful black cat. I remember being disappointed that not every picture of Miss Sniff was textured and fuzzy. I still own the book, and most of the fuzziness has worn off from decades of loving touches, but enough traces of the texture remain to intrigue any tactile child. The first time I encountered a pop-up book, I found myself transported to new heights of imagination and wonder. I remember carefully and delicately manipulating the pull-tabs and slide levers, studying the mechanics of how all of these things worked. If someone else could fold and glue paper in such a way as to transform two-dimensions into glorious three-dimensional marvels upon opening the book, then perhaps I could, too. The tactile qualities of these books held my attention much longer than mere words or pictures could have.

Helen Keller could not see anything, except for extremely bright lights, such as the sun’s rays reflecting off fresh snow. Helen could not hear any sounds at all. She did enjoy many physical activities (swimming, tandem-bicycling, and horseback riding) and probably had strong kinesthetic learning abilities, but those were also hindered by her blindness — it is difficult to run freely when you cannot see what you may trip over. Therefore, with her few remaining senses as her sole means for exploration, Helen became extremely adept at feeling textures, vibrations, and movements. After Helen had learned Morse code by having it tapped onto her hand, her teacher could communicate with Helen from across the room by tapping on the floor with her shoe. Helen identified flowers and other plants (and people) by their scents, but she could also describe the physical qualities in amazing detail. Those of us who function primarily with our visual and auditory senses tend to completely overlook the tactile characteristics of our everyday lives.

2. Idle hands can mean a disengaged mind. A child who just cannot seem to sit still and stop fidgeting during lessons may suddenly relax and become an academic sponge if allowed to draw, play with blocks, or hold a favorite toy while listening. To insist that students sit still with empty hands and give undivided attention to every spoken word is to hinder some students’ learning processes. Some children just cannot do that and learn at the same time: their movement is a vital part of how they take in information. Have you ever known a child who was so attached to his blanket or his favorite stuffed toy that he could barely endure the separation required for the laundering process? That child is most likely a tactile learner. His attachment is not emotional as much as it is necessary for concentration. Visual students absorb information through their eyes, auditory students absorb information through their ears, and tactile students absorb information through their hands. Giving their fingers something to “focus” on will stimulate their eyes and ears into “learning mode,” allowing their brains to absorb information through the other senses as well.

Upon meeting the unruly 6-year-old Helen, Anne Sullivan commented that Helen’s hands were untaught and unsatisfied, destroying anything they contacted, simply because they knew no other way. Anne’s greatest accomplishment, therefore, was in teaching the hands, and through them, she taught the mind. When Helen’s hands had interesting stimuli, Helen learned. Obviously, Helen Keller’s hands were the only portal through which knowledge could be imparted to her, but those of us with tactile children can learn from her example: gain the attention of the student’s hands and fingers and reach his mind through them.

3. Do not focus on what your child knows, but focus on what you want your child to learn. The break-through in teaching abstract concepts to Helen Keller came as Helen was stringing beads. Her teacher, Anne Sullivan, had started a pattern of beads for Helen to copy. When Helen’s attempts proved incorrect, Anne removed them and encouraged Helen to begin again. After several failed attempts, Helen paused to consider her mistakes, and Anne touched Helen’s forehead and then spelled the word t-h-i-n-k into Helen’s hand. Helen quickly grasped that words could relate to ideas and intangible concepts, opening a world to her far beyond the straightforward naming of physical objects. Miss Sullivan never assumed that Helen was unteachable; she saw only that Helen was inexperienced.

Educational scope-and-sequence listings have probably done as much harm as they have done good for some not-so-average children by convincing educators and parents alike that certain benchmarks should be reached at certain ages. We tend to rely on that information more than on our instincts and become unduly concerned when our students reach those goals either before or after the scheduled date. How silly. In the immortal words of my local meteorologist, “There is no such thing as normal; there is only average.” He was speaking of temperatures and weather patterns, but in educational terms, quicker learners and slower learners combine to create the scope-and-sequence averages.

Our tendency as parents is to fluctuate between only two reactions to our children’s accomplishments: “Not yet!” (meaning “you’re not old enough to do that yet”) and “Not yet?” (meaning “every other child has already done this”). As the educators for our children, we need to follow the lead of the child who wants to take on an ambitious project, though perhaps helping him to scale it back as needed in the beginning. The child who has already learned a lesson is ready to move on, and we must be careful not to bury the student with boredom who is eager for more. Too often we can bog the student down with what we feel is appropriate to his age (or grade level) and completely disregard what is appropriate for his abilities. Working with the child to set goals will give him something to reach for, something to stretch his current abilities and broaden them into his future talents, no matter which side of average he may be.

Setting goals that are too lofty can overwhelm the less gifted student, leaving him floundering at simple lessons that have become overshadowed by looking too far into the future. Careful attention to each student’s abilities and personality will tell you when to press on and when to linger a bit longer. Scope-and-sequence guidelines should be taken as just that: guidelines — a map for the journey, but not a day-by-day itinerary. Taking longer to learn a certain lesson does not mean that the child has learned less that the quicker student; in fact, they have both achieved the same goal (learning a particular lesson), just at different rates. The slower student may actually be absorbing more detailed information than the quicker child does. Helping your slower learner to break down his goals into doable steps will give him more occasions to celebrate and prevent discouragement along the way.

While students at schools for the deaf or blind struggled with learning even basic reading and writing techniques, Anne Sullivan insisted on teaching Helen Keller at home, feeling it was a more natural environment for learning and exploring. Anne abandoned scheduled lessons and simply led Helen on daily adventures through normal life, believing that “lessons” might limit the range of knowledge Helen could absorb. Her hunch proved correct, as Helen excelled far beyond what anyone dreamed possible and far beyond any progress made by previous deaf-blind students. Helen rapidly made up for lost time by learning to “read” lips with her fingers, learning to speak audibly, learning to read five different versions of Braille and raised print, and learning to write with pencil and paper, as well as with a typewriter and a Braille-writer. Helen learned to read and speak in English, French, and German — all before she entered a private high school to prepare for college. Helen had set attending college as her own goal while still a young girl just beginning to learn and accomplished her graduation from Radcliffe College under a schedule considered normal for hearing and sighted students. I think there is a tremendous lesson for all of us in this example, whether we are homeschooling or not. We should set our goals high enough to stretch our current abilities and see what those abilities can become in the future.

4. Language is the key to all learning. Anne Sullivan communicated with Helen Keller in complete sentences, even before young Helen understood all of the words in those sentences. Believing that language would be the magic that could bring Helen out of her prison of deafness and blindness, Anne strived for communication with Helen in as normal a fashion as possible. Once Helen had grasped the basic fundamentals of the manual alphabet and understood the words spelled into her hand, Anne began reading books to Helen, spelling word after word, sentence after sentence, and page after page into the eager hand of her knowledge-thirsty pupil. The resulting success was phenomenal: Helen’s dramatic progress astounded everyone as she quickly and easily surpassed the milestones of other deaf-blind students before her.

Miss Sullivan read book after book to Helen, whose mind soaked up the intricacies of language at an amazing rate. Having learned very little of spoken language before losing her hearing as a toddler and losing even that much in the years of silence that followed, Helen’s 7-year-old mind was virtually a blank page. However, she learned the grammar and sentence structure necessary for intelligent communication through the language of the books that were read to her. Later, as her writings were published in a children’s magazine, Helen’s command of language was so comprehensive that many skeptics viciously accused her and her dedicated teacher of fraud.

Time spent reading aloud to your children will never be time wasted. Their minds can comprehend the language far sooner than their eyes can read the words for themselves. Continue to read aloud to your students as they grow older, and enjoy a variety of books: poetry, such as Robert Louis Stevenson’s A Child’s Garden of Verses; mysteries and adventure stories, such as Treasure Island; and histories, such as The Little House series, as well as such childhood standards as Alice in Wonderland and Winnie the Pooh. The beautifully rhythmic language of older books will prove far more desirable to modern tales, even if you have to stop to define a word or phrase now and then. Discussing how some words have changed meanings over time will become a fascinating supplemental lesson. Your student’s vocabulary will be increased through read-aloud time, as well as through conversation. Whenever we encountered a word of vague meaning, we grabbed the dictionary. It seldom cost us our concentration on the book’s plot and always increased our knowledge. I often used words that my students were not familiar with, but in defining a word for them, rather than not using it, the words were quickly added to their ever-increasing vocabularies.

The tactile learner will be better able to absorb read-aloud stories if his hands are allowed to keep busy. Drawing, coloring, painting, modeling with clay, building with blocks or construction sets, stringing beads, or assembling puzzles are all activities that can be quietly performed while also listening to a book being read aloud. Too many of us have been conditioned to think that a student can only pay attention as long as constant eye contact is maintained. While that technique may be necessary in a classroom with dozens of students and may be somewhat true for the more easily distracted students, it rarely applies to most auditory or tactile learners.

Exploring the world through textures and movements adds another dimension for visual and auditory learners, but it may also be the key that opens the door of learning for the tactile student. If you are not sure if your student is a tactile learner, try some of these methods and see if they make a difference. Instead of nagging a child to “put that down” or “keep your hands in your lap,” working with his constantly active hands will allow his fingers to lead his brain in the search for knowledge. Remember that the tactile learner absorbs information through his fingertips, and we should strive to give those fingers plenty of “reading material.”

For more tips on teaching a tactile learner, see Topical Index: Learning Styles.

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